Empathy is a dangerous and scary emotion. It forces you to look at people more complexly – which means that they may not necessarily be the bad guy you make them out to be – and by default, that means you might not be the good guy.
Not to mention things like jealously, judgment, resentment, and anger can get in the way of practicing empathy.
I work REALLY hard to be empathetic. In my professional and personal life.
But let's get real, I'm human and I slip up sometimes. It's not easy to admit to yourself or others that you're being unfair, and sometimes we don't even have the ability to recognize what we're doing.
Empathy goes back to that underlying principal John Green is always referencing: Imagining people complexly.
Which means that what when we want to lash out and judge we're taking a complex individual and breaking them down into something unfairly black and white.
Now don't get me wrong. Just because a person or situation is 'complex' it doesn't mean they get excuses made for them. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that once we get a better UNDERSTANDING then we can deal with the situation in the most appropriate way.
I always want people to react empathetically to me. I want to be understood – without judgment.
So you know that old catchy phrase, do unto others as you would have them do unto you?
Yeah, that's the one all the cool kids practice.
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